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BigBillStyle
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Name: Bill
Country: United States
State: Colorado
Metro: Denver
Birthday: 3/11/1986
Gender: Male
Interests: I dig the outdoors stuff. Any kind of backpacking or rock climbing. I love to kickbox and I play the guitar. I occasionally write.
Occupation: Other
Industry: Other
Message: message me
Website: visit my website
Member Since:
6/15/2005
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| I've been thinking about Pride and Ignorance and how they are so closely tied together. Some may think that the ignorant person is not prideful, but in fact it is their own pride which perpetuates their ignorance. The humble man is not afraid of learning, asking questions, and narrowing the gap of his own ignorance whereas the prideful man doesn't want to appear as not knowing something and therefore never has the humility to learn.
I'm reading Ed Viestur's book No Shortcuts to the Top. It is a very inspiring and captivating read. Ed has climbed all fourteen of the 8,000 meter peaks and it is full of some pretty amazing stories. Sadly he tells tales of many people meeting their demise due to either ignorance or pride. People who would push for the summit motivated by their pride in spite of fatigue, worsening weather, edema, etc. Now don't get me wrong there are many people who die on the mountain due to things beyond their control. Mountaineering is risky stuff and even when you assess the risk do everything you should, there is always a margin for failure. These are not the people I'm talking about. I'm talking about people who don't minimize the risk or bail on a summit because of their pride. It's not about getting to the top, it's about getting home.
The problem is that people don't know what they don't know. Think about it. I'll say it again.
People don't know what they don't know. This is true of everyone. You, me, everyone. I've had the displeasure of climbing with too many people who make it surprising that what they didn't know didn't kill them. Ed tells a story of two Mexican climbers on K2 who tried to descend a steep slope by rappelling off of a ski pole. They didn't bury it like a dead man anchor, but rather just stuck it vertically in the snow! It held the weight of the first climber, but when the second climber weighed it, the pole pulled and he fell 3,000 ft to his death. They didn't know that you should rappel off of a ski pole.
John Ruskin says that "Pride is at the bottom of all great mistakes," and I tend to agree with him. Yes, the back country is more unforgiving than our own "concrete jungle" that we've established, but the lessons and principles transcend to our everyday life.
How many relationships has your pride cost you? Whether not be able to say you're sorry or just having to always be right; never being able to deepen those relationships because pride bears schisms that keep us apart.
How many opportunities to learn and grow has your pride cost you?
Derek Bok says, "Think education is expensive, try ignorance." He's exactly right. How many times has our ignorance cost us something more dearly than the process of education would have?
Ignorance is at the root of all fear, for we fear that which we do not understand. Ignorance has fueled racism, hate, and the perpetual stunting of our ability to grow because ignorance values bliss over maturity.
At some point you have to come to realize that we know nothing about one another. Inside us all there lies multitudes and even in our "deepest" dorm room talks we only, if ever barely scratch the surface of one another. We are so ignorant of what is inside of the people around us. Unaware of the depth or intensity of their character, dreams, insecurities, hurts, failures, accomplishments, and value because ignorance is satisfied with its answers and is content with its knowledge. I might even take it a step further and venture to say that we are ignorant of ourselves. Pride keeps us at a place where we think we're better than we are instead of looking down to all of who we are. In unforgiving examples, pride and ignorance lead to the death or the absence of life. In everyday living I would rather think of these things not as the absence of life but rather things that inhibit the experiencing life. The removing of life and if we call that taking of life death, then so be it. | | |
| I’ve been reflecting on the old phrase, “Jack of all trades; master of none.” I watched on my Net Flix a movie entitled, “How to Cook Your Life.” It’s a documentary about a Zen Buddhist who has a cooking school. One of the things that stuck out to me that I’ve always appreciated about the eastern mindset is the attention to detail and care in each task no matter how small or large. At one point in the film he says, “If you’re going to cut the carrots, then cut the carrots. If you’re going to wash the rice, then wash the rice.” The last couple of days, I’ve been very intentional about doing each task with great care. So when I put my books in the book bag, I take care to do so and give that task its own special attention. When I go for walks I try to take the time to look at my steps as a three part process of picking up the foot, stepping, and then setting it down. This slows things down and I enjoy God’s creation more. The busyness of our lives robs us of the ability to cultivate our soul. If I can’t take care in small tasks, then how can I love people well? If I’m careless with everything else in the day, doing task half assed, then how do I cultivate the ability to show people their own special attention and care to that relationship? On a separate note, I’ve been reading a book by Joeseph Ratzinger (the current Pope) He had an amazing thought about inspiration. I’d like to share it with you: “…it is necessary to keep in mind that any human utterance of a certain weight contains more than the author may have been immediately aware of at the time. When a word transcends the moment in which it is spoken, it carries within itself a ‘deeper value.’ This ‘deeper value’ pertains most of all to words that have matured in the course of faith-history. For in this case the author is not simply speaking for himself on his own authority. He is speaking from the perspective of a common history that sustains him and that already implicitly contains the possibilities of its future, of the further stages of its journey. The process of continually rereading and drawing out new meanings from words would not have been possible unless the words themselves were already open to it from within.” That’s pretty interesting…. Think about it. To make a bit of far parallel, what kind of potential do you have inside of you that draw new meanings that could not have already been there in creation. Man, God is good stuff. | | |
| thoughts and feelings are like a crowded building that is on fire and has doors that swing into the building. When everyone is trying to get out they can't open the doors and that same desire to rush out is the force that allows nothing at all. P.S. I love Tim Lowe, but I hate Texas. | | |
| I saw the little neighbor girl at my new apartment complex blowing bubbles with her grandma. They would rise and only a few would make it past the tree branches and float out of sight. This made me think of the old phrase, "Don't burst my bubble." From what I gather, the idea is that their dream is so silly and fragile that if it encounters anything, then it will pop. Bubble pop... that's what they do. A bubble goes wherever the wind takes it and it it is not a suitable vessel for our dreams and aspirations. Instead we should say things like, "Don't sink my motorboat." A motor boat is capable of going against the current and going up stream. It can handle the crashing of waves, but if one is significant in size, it will rightfully sink. That's only fair. Let's be honest, no matter how hard I tried, I wouldn't be able to get into the NBA. My height is a large enough wave to sink that ship. The motor boat seems to be a much better metaphor. Don't sink my motor boat. | | |
| As school winds down to an end, I start to reflect on all the things that I'll miss about life here. Of course there are definitely things that I will not miss. I won't miss the 8:00 classes and the late night study sessions, but those things I'm sure will be replaced with 8:00 meetings and late night planning sessions. The people here can sometimes take for granted the good relationships with the people around them and I definitely won't miss that. There's a lot of people in this life that you won't get to experience life with and the sad part is that it's because of a lack of trying.
CCU has been something that has been such a big part of my heart that will no longer will be apart of my life. I passed on Trash Club presidency to David Hein tonight and although it was hard, I can't think of anybody else that I would entrust with that club. He'll be able to lead those guys in ways I never could. No for me, it's a matter of figuring out how to do translate that service over to the people in the apartments I'll be living in? What are the needs and how can I serve that community? We had the honors ceremony last night and I was chosen for "Servic to CCU" and "Outstanding Senior in Youth Ministry." I can't tell you how blessed and humbled I was that night. Especially considering all the wonderful people at this university. I think that's when it sunk in how much I was going to miss this place. These really have been the best years of my life.
I'm moving out with Kurt Post about seven miles north of the school into Arvada and I'm really excited. It's far enough away to be removed from the CCU culture, but it's also close enough to keep up relationships that I really value. It's hard though because I've made such great relationships this year that I don't want to just drop, but I don't want to be that guy who graduated... but didn't really because you see him around all the time. It's a hard balance.
It'll be interesting to see what my life looks when I no longer have school dictating my schedule. Some of the questions I'm asking now:
-How do I cultivate my spirituality outside of CCU?
-What steps am I going to take to stick to my budget?
-How do you value relationships outside of CCU?
-What things are very important to my spiritual life?
-Where am I going and how am I getting there?
On a seperate note, I wish that the English language had more words. I know this sounds ridiculous but I do. My vocabulary is fairly large, but I sometimes feel like we more words to convey exactly what we think and how we feel. The Greeks had several different words for words like, House and Love. I guess I just never want people to get lost in the generalities of semantics when it comes to how I feel about them. Sometimes the words we have are too small for the meaning I want to put behind them. So when I say, "I really appreciate you," I'd have five different words to pick from to convey appreciation in the sense I desire. Just a thought. | | |
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